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At the Laundromat with T. Austin-Sparks

"I think very often we are troubled and bothered about something that is not true as to ourselves. We are thinking un-truths about ourselves.
Of course, we know our prone-ness to sin we know the evil that is in our flesh,we know how wicked we are and how unworthy,and all that: but then we allow that to go too far. I ask you this: with all our unworthiness, all our sinfulness, all that is evil in our flesh, have we not a heart for the Lord after all? We feel we blunder, we err-yes, but we have a heart for the Lord. Where did that heart come from? There was a time when we had no heart for the Lord, when we had no disposition, no tendency, that way; we were not inclined after the lord. But something has happened in us stronger and deeper than all our weaknesses, and our waywardness, our follies and our sins. There is a reaction every time we make a mistake, and sends us back to the Lord in grief,in sorrow, in disappointment, in longing, and we are not happy again until we have found the Lord.
Where does that disposition come from? It is something done by Him. That is the basis of worship; that is the ground upon which the lord will get everything. so do not let ourselves be discouraged by ourselves too much. You will never think that I am saying that we are to condone our sinfulness,and our foolishness, and to give place to them, but it is a glorious fact, that, while all this is true and Satan can tell us so much about ourselves that is bad, nevertheless we can reply in the famous words of the hymn:

I know it all, and thousands more
Jehovah findeth none.

We can come back against all accusation and say, "nevertheless God has done
something in me that has set my heart towards Him. With all my failures, my heart is towards Him. With all my breakdowns, I am for the Lord. And so we go on.
This spirit, this law of worship consumes and consumes,and we find at last in His presence that there is nothing left but Himself, ,just Himself.

That is a simple word, but that after all underlies all that is here about Jerusalem. All that we shall have to say, or could say,as to the details of the matter of the rebuilding of the wall has its roots in the soil of worship.
(speaking of the rebuilding of the wall in Nehemiah....my footnote)
This Jerusalem is to be a praise in the earth, it is to speak of God's Glory. It is all to point toward the Lord. It is all to testify of His glory and His honour. That is what Jerusalem exists for, and that is what we who are of the spiritual and heavenly Jerusalem exist for-to bring everything back to the Lord, to bring delight to His heart, and to constitute a testimony that He is satisfied."

The Recovering of the Lord's Testimony in Fullness
T. Austin-Sparks
Page 41-43

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